Why I'll Never Be An Adult
I just finished reading the amazingness that is Hyperbole and a Half. I haven't laughed so hard in so long. The kind of laugh that actually hurts your gut. I completely related to not wanting the responsibilities of being a "grown up". I hate having days where I've actually got errands to run and "stuff" on my to do list. I hate signing up for anything because that means that *HORRORS OF ALL HORRORS* I will have to put something on my calendar and actually be on time for something. I loathe the day my children start participating in sports, or what have you. My perfect life would be an endless vacation where I have zero responsibilities all the days long and I wake up and the whole day is my oyster. I think I've got some issues that need to be worked out.
In any case, I needed a good hard gut busting laugh too. I've been spending far too much time feeling sorry for myself. Far too much time with my head up my arse thinking that nobody can possibly have it as bad as I do right now. Maybe I need to be slapped too?
I had an MRI done on Wednesday evening and received my results yesterday. I've got a herniated disc in my lower back. I mean, how the hell does this even happen? I'm ONLY 35 years old. I take pretty good care of my body. I work out regularly. I do planks till the damn cows come home. I'm at a healthy weight. I AVOID (most) processed food DAMMIT! HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN!?!?!
Needless to say. I've received and processed this news as if I've just been told I've got terminal cancer. How much of an asshole am I anyway? There are actually people out there right now who have, in fact, terminal cancer, and I'm sure they'd trade places with me in a heart beat. So please. Just slap me.
My despair probably has a lot to do with the fact that I've gotten about 2-3 hrs of sleep a night due to the pain. I'm not sure what exactly sleep deprivation's effects are on the human body, but I do know that it is used to torture the enemy so it can't be good. At some point I expect that I'll start hallucinating and speaking in tongues. This morning horns officially sprung out of my head and I think my head spun around a couple of times as well.
Tomorrow morning I go back to the orthopedic doctor to discuss the next step. I'm not sure exactly, but I'm pretty sure it involves a really long needle that they'll want to stick into my spine. You think I'm spending too much time feeling sorry for myself now? Just you wait.
3 comments:
So sorry! You are right though EVERYTHING seems about 800 times worse on no sleep. Hang in there! Miss you!
Andrea - Oh goodness, I hope you begin to feel better soon. And may you get some rest! That is key!!
Andrea, that is SO painful! That happened to my Dad and he couldn't move! How are you taking care of two small children?!?!?! It is probably a blessing that you are living with your parents right now. I hope they are able to fix your back soon. Just remember, "This too shall pass". Before you know it, you 4 will be relaxing in your new home PAIN FREE!
Post a Comment